Charlie tried to commit suicide today. They have one of those sky trams at the zoo, and since two year olds climb everything, Charlie had to try (repeatedly) scaling and hurling himself off a swinging bucket 300 ft in the air. I don't normally go all dizzy and pasty faced around heights, but apparently that all changes when you're trying to hold a kicking, screaming, back arching tornado. All I can say is there's a good reason God made toddlers small enough that the death grip is still effective.
But we had fun at the zoo. So much fun, I didn't strangle the dog with my bare hands when I came home and discovered he ate all the Munster cheese, and I didn't get one single morsel.
I didn't even kill my sister when I found out I had to redo three loads of laundry (white loads... sock and underwear purgatory).
But when I went to make homemade lemon cleaner and discovered almost all the white vinegar was gone... man, there was hell to pay.
also, the creepy boy statue in my front yard annoys me.
I had forty five pounds of lemons hiding in a giant cardboard box, and gosh darn it, I wanted homemade, non toxifying, germ annihilator.
The recipes I found on the internet said to put one lemon peel in a jar with 3 cups of vinegar. One lemon? One? Are you kidding. I have enough lemons to wipe the ridiculous smile off Dora The Explorer, and pucker her incessant shouting into silence. That is a lot of lemons.
So I did four. You can't have too much lemon oil in a vinegar based cleaner can you?
Then I introduced the lemons to their new slave driver. I had to use an old pasta sauce jar since Ionly had about a cup of vinegar.
Even future toilet cleaner looks pretty next to flowers.
Like a nastier version of Limoncello, you have to let this cleaner sit in a dark corner and think on its sins for a couple of weeks, giving it a good shake every once in awhile.
After its more citrusy than stinky, dilute it one part cleaning solution to three parts water, put it in a spray bottle and kick your house into shape.
4 lemon peels
1 jar with lid
white vinegar (fill to top)
Sit. Shake. Wait. And turn your four naked lemons into lemonade.
I only have approx 44.5 lbs of lemons now. Awesome.